What is a Death Cafe?
Death is something every one of us will face, yet it’s rarely something we talk about openly, until we have to. A Death Cafe offers a different way in: a free, no-agenda space where people can talk about death, dying, and what matters to them, surrounded by others who are just as willing to listen as they are to speak.
At a Death Cafe, there’s no counsellor steering the discussion and no expectation that you’ll leave with answers. It’s simply a group of people – friends, strangers, whānau, the curious and the grieving alike, sitting down together over tea and cake to talk about something we all share but so rarely say out loud.
The idea began in the UK in 2011, developed by Jon Underwood and drawing on the earlier work of Swiss sociologist Bernard Crettaz. It has since grown into a global movement running in more than 90 countries, all following the same simple principles: not-for-profit, confidential, and open to anyone, whatever their age, background, or beliefs.
Why Talking About Death Matters
Talking about death doesn’t make it easier to bear, but it does make it easier to face together. Conversations like these can help take away some of the fear and mystery, give you clarity on your own wishes, and build the confidence to have similar conversations with the people you love.
Death Cafes also play an important part in bringing death and dying out of the shadows and into the spotlight. By creating everyday spaces for open, honest conversation, they help shift death from something whispered about to something we can speak of plainly. A shift that ripples out into families, workplaces, and communities. It’s this kind of gentle, community-led support that sits at the heart of everything we do at Go With Grace, and it’s exactly why Death Cafes are such a natural part of Dying Matters Week.This is a paragraph, one or more lines of text. Each paragraph is displayed in a new line.
Upcoming Death Cafe Events
This Dying Matters Week, communities across the motu are opening their doors to Death Cafes, providing a warm, welcoming way to start the conversation. No experience is needed, no RSVP required, and everyone is welcome. Nau mai, haere mai, hoki mai koutou. Find an event near you below.
Hosting your own?
If you’d like to run a Death Cafe in your own community during Dying Matters Week, visit our Event Toolkit for posters and resources, or find out how to list your event. Have you been to a Death Cafe, or are you thinking about hosting one? We’d love to hear from you — get in touch at [email protected].
Get Involved in Dying Matters Week
Get involved in Dying Matters Week, running events, volunteering, giving talks or sponsoring programmes. Stay up to date with the latest events, resources, and discussions via our monthly newsletter.
