By Nilguen Yalay
I remember this so clearly!
You were 12 and I was 9 when we fell in love for the first time
The adults around us smiled mildly, shaking their heads, exclaiming:
“ Oh how cute!!”
But for us, it was real love and we learned that it was better to hide it from judgment
We promised each other a 1000 kisses while shyly and secretly holding hands
And during the years of growing up in our different places
I kept you safely in my heart, your soul stayed near in my dreams of a future together one day…
It was Kinderliebe and it was real!!
And when one day my grandmother burst into my room and said: “
guess who I just spoke to on the phone? “
I knew instantly that you had come back into my orbit!
You were 19 and I was 16 when we fell in love for the second time!
And this time, my sweet friend, we could let it spread its wings and
take us to great heights, discovering life and love together, studying
the old Anarchists and dreaming of a fairer world It was still like
Kinderliebe and so real!!!
But our fate was not to stay together for a long time, we both had
other paths to travel and other loves to live…
Yet, we never lost sight of each other, connected by an invisible
thread, your generous heart always held space for me , even when I
was far away from you!
You are deeply and eternally connected to my soul and I never will forget who we were…
Children who loved each other for a life time!
Now that you have crossed over to the Spirit world I will invite you
back into my dreams, my dearest and longest friend
Travel well and don’t forget to pick me up one day
Even in our older years it was Kinderliebe!!
For my beloved first love who died on 24th of May 2024 Nilguen Yalay.
This poem was generously shared with Go With Grace, as part of Dying Matters Week 2024. Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful words.
